The Biggest Loser Couples Recap -- Episode 11

SURPRISE, SURPRISE

We are now down to six players from the original twenty. Alison assembles everyone in the gym, and tells them that the players they have voted off are back. All of them. Dan is worried he’ll have to beat them all again. Kelly is angry, and shows it. What, she doesn’t want to share a room with Paul anymore? Alison says that one man and one woman will be reinstated into the game based on their at-home weight loss. Just by sight, I can tell you that my partner, Jennifer, and her dad, Lynn, first booted off, are going right back home. I seem to be holding up this team. Bette-Sue is there to support Ali, who looks great. Bette-Sue knows she herself isn’t going to be back anytime soon.

Neil has lost a lot of weight and seems to have a better attitude than he had during his time onscreen, but I still don’t want to see him on a weekly basis again. His wife, Amanda, is still the little meek, soft-spoken stepford wife, but now she’s literally LITTLE. Way to go, Amanda! Jacki is surprised by Dan’s transformation, and even more surprised by his tattoo, but what can she do? I’d be more upset about him knocking back drinks and swapping spit in Vegas until 6:a.m., but that’s just the mom in me. So far, at home the players have lost an amazing amount of weight, but in the end, it’s Mark and Ali who will remain in the house. At least Mark’s son gets another go at some honeybuns while he’s gone. Of course, Mark has to CRY about being reunited with is brother, Jay. For losing 90 lbs., Mark gets to choose his trainer, and he chooses to go back to Bob and the Blue Boys. Ali gets Jillian by default, which could only be a good thing, and opts to keep wearing a pink shirt in memory of her mom, Bette-Sue. The Black team, all wearing their shirts, don’t let their disappointment in her choice of colors go unnoticed.

THE TRAINERS AND THEIR VICTIMS

Bob greets Mark like he’s Jesus and it’s the Second Coming. Dan grabs Mark a blue shirt and they all do their Blue Boy hug thing. Meanwhile, Jillian has to deal with the pity party going on over in the Black corner. The ladies are quiet and feeling sorry for themselves because there are two more players to beat now and their metabolism won’t allow them to keep up. Jillian thinks the mood is more about Bernie leaving, but when Ali walks in, wearing her pink shirt, it dawns on Jillian that her team really sucks emotionally, but she can’t say it out loud. In her best imitation of her mother, she gives them a pep talk about doing whatever it takes, because winning the competition is off the table (nice pep talk from your TRAINER), but winning your life because you lose weight and get healthy is their goal. She tells them that they need to get out of victim mode, and only worry about the things they can control. They cannot control the game, but they can control their contribution to their health.

Mark cooks for the Blue team, which isn’t really the Blue team anymore, but as individuals they still wear their shirts and bond like boy scouts. They cry a lot. At dinner, Ali sits with the Blue Boys because they were her friends when she was still in the house. The Black team, which isn’t the Black team anymore either, cannot even focus on their non-descriptive dinners because of the pity party they are imposing on themselves. Finally, Jillian walks over and asks Ali if she’s finished and tells her that her dinner will probably come back up after their workout. Jillian is full of couth, can’t you tell? At the gym, Jillian has no mercy (surprise there…) on Ali, but she seems to ignore the rest of the not-Black anymore team. Instead of working their butts off, literally, they put the treadmills on pause and watch. How stupid is that? Back in their room later the non-Black ladies complain to Jillian that they are worried that Ali has upset the balance of things. Jillian is worried that they will revert to their old habits, as Maggie has demonstrated by all of her emotional eating since Ali and Mark were brought back. My question is, what is there in the house to eat? Is the vending machine from last week still standing? Geesh. This is really one sappy episode.

THE CHALLENGE

It’s raining outside. Inside of a tent, we see eight bikes lined up in rows of light bulbs. We hear electricity. Rain. Light Bulbs. Electricity. Vincent Price would be proud. Anyway, they have to get on the bikes and peddle long and hard enough to light each bulb. The last two folks to light up are eliminated until one is still standing. They are told they will be burning off kilojules, which I prefer to spell KILO-JEWELS, which apparently we all do, to keep the bulbs on. Dan is ready. Mark is ready. Of course Kelly is nervous. In fact, she finally admits she’s the weakest link. Since she’s not on a team anymore though, it doesn’t matter. She just needs to stay above the yellow line. Dan and Mark are the last two peddling, with Dan taking home the prize: TWO votes at the elimination, as long as he’s above the yellow line.